In this set of articles, we will see a certain type of female characters, who dedicate their lives to finding its untimed end.
This article is advised to be read only by mature audience (18+) who don’t have any suicidal thoughts and/or trauma.
There are people, who are having thoughts about death due to being forced into an impossible situation with no hope and no happy ending. However, this article concentrates on other people, who “search” for it, even though there are no visible reasons for them to seek death.
How death-seekers are different from the lost ones.
The first thing we have to note is the way of people who unwillingly end up in a suicidal situation. There are several stages:
- Depression, caused by an unsolvable situation, “trap”.
- Suicidal signs, that are given to trusted people around so they can take action and help.
- And finally, a moment of seemed happiness, that happens a few hours/days before it’s committed.
On the other side, death-seekers we study in this article do now follow that route. And the reason is that death is not something undesirable to them, but quite the opposite… That leads to certain conclusions:
- Seeking death is not a moment, but a lifestyle, therefore there may be no “situation” going on for a heavy period of time.
- When the situation finally appears/forms, the character doesn’t seem to care about it that much, they are certainly less worried than people around. After all, for them, it’s just another opportunity among many they’ve found or created over previous years of life.
- As all humans have natural self-preservation, death-seekers desire is unconscious, otherwise, they would have to fight their own self-preserving mechanisms.
As you can see, the difference is overwhelming. One cannot simply mistake one person with another.
So let’s take a look at “death-seekers”.
Euphemia li Britannia
Euphie leads what seems to be a relatively happy and simple life. When Suzaku first meets her in episode 5, he doesn’t even know that she’s “mourning” her recently dead brother. After just meeting her on that same day, Suzaku takes a weird step and says: “Your wish is my command”. Let’s remember that detail.
The very next moment Euphie demands to be taken to Shinjuku. There they get into a messy incident between the Japanese and Brittannians, and immediately after into another brawl between military units fighting. As Suzaku intervenes with the fight, Euphemia jumps right under the deadly fire, causing everyone around to almost have a heart attack. How does Euphie react after she almost has died? She doesn’t. She proceeds to have a casual conversation with Suzaku as if nothing happened.
At this point, Suzaku should’ve reminisced on the moment they first met. Euphemia jumped out of the palace window, located on the fifth floor! Needless to say, her odds of surviving that fall were slim. Not to mention she used a fairly short curtain as a rope. The reason why people use ropes and not curtains (unless completely desperate) is because ropes are made that way, so they don’t tear under the pressure. We weren’t shown what she tied that curtain to either. A table that can fly out with her, perhaps?
In any case, Euphemia doesn’t talk about her life-threatening jump even for a second. She announces her fall happily and then proceeds to talk to Suzaku like nothing happened. Shen Suzaku expresses concern for her, she thinks for a second with an even expression and then makes up a lie of being chased “by the bad guys”.
A casual viewer assumes, when thinking of this confusing situation, that Euphemia was forced to make that jump under the circumstances. As if her youth spirit, trapped by the closed doors of the royal building forced her to escape to have the first look at the city of Japan, that she loved so much.
However, that doesn’t add up with the facts.
- In later episodes, Euphemia visits the art gallery on her own will before the opening of it officially began.
- She also visits Lelouch and Nunnally’s school incognito. Certainly, that wasn’t a part of her official schedule.
- Euphie visited the hotel at the time of its hijacking, also incognito.
During those visits, she was only followed by one or two of her most loyal bodyguards, who never speak to others about what she did and why.
In other words, if Euphie ever wanted to see the city, look at the store windows, and mourn Shinjuku, there was nothing preventing her from walking out of the front door. If she wanted to sneak out, then the back door, perhaps.
But Euphemia chooses another option. The life-ending jump from the fifth floor is more attractive to her. A conscious girl wouldn’t dare. But she clearly gives it no big thought. Because it’s a lifestyle, and a subconscious one.
To be continued.